For a Friend...not seeing progress

I got a comment from a friend expressing her frustration in not losing weight. This problem is so, so, so prevelent in women, especially new moms, trying to lose those extra pounds. Hold on to your seat I have a very long answer that is quite simple on black and white, but the most difficult feat I've seen accomplished. This problem will truly take hard work, maybe a very long time to accomplish but it will pay off all of your life.

Here's what she wrote: "in the last 5 months of me exercising at least an hour- sometimes 2- for 6 out of the 7 days of the week I have lost only 4 lbs, and that's because I got the flu last week and couldn't eat anything. What more can I do? I am eating less sweets, and I try to eat healthy foods. I don't know what more I can do, and I am getting quite depressed about it... Thanks"



From a professional background: the answer is quite simple (but not easy for sure). You are consuming too many calories. Contributing to your problem is that you are exercising too much. Being inactive is not the culprit, eating too much is. I know that sounds harsh, but let me explain.

Moving Too Much--The first thing anyone wants to do when they lose weight is get moving-burn calories. Then they want to cut calories, they also want to replace old foods with newer healthier foods that contain less, fat, sugar, and carbs. You put all this together and it's like a bomb goes off in your body. Not only physically, but mentally and especially neurally/chemically. You are working more, eating less and not feeding your body like it has been used to, then you expect sunshine when you ordered a natural disaster. You need to slow down. First, get right to the problem; assess which area you most want to work on. Focus more attention on that one area (you can still incorporate moderate amounts of other things).

Eating Too Much-- This is the other area that gets flipped upside down. While you are busy exercising and making healthier choices you may not see the calories still adding up. Even if you made a plan of how many calories you need to consume or not consume to hit your target weight. I know I'm as guilty as anyone, that's why it has taken me years to get to this point in my life. This is a HARD reality to face: Do you honestly know where your calories are coming from? Take time to see it. Take time to notice things that trigger wanting to eat, times you eat (every single time you eat you need to know it, recognize it, value it), know what hungry is, know what a craving is, know what satisfied feels like, know what full feels like, know what overfull feels like, know what stuffed feels like. Also, addressing the feelings that result from our actions. I've said this over and over and I will continue to say it over and over: ABS WERE MADE IN THE KITCHEN, NOT THE GYM. The true and real way to lose weight is to be in control of HOW much you eat. Of course there is quality food and there is junk, but if all you care about it losing excess weight you need to focus on what you are ingesting, NOT how much you are expending (that comes later). Whew, sorry about the rampage. This is the kicker and it's not quick. I've been working on changing my mental, emotional and chemical(yes, it's a chemical reaction the way you eat) status of eating since I married Tom. It's been gradual and committing, but worth it. Over the last four years I've come to generally not worry about how much I eat because I know my body will tell me when I'm done. If I eat more than that it's because I want to and don't care about the excess weight that will inevitably show up a few days later. YOUR BODY IS THE MOST EFFICIENT MACHINE KNOWN TO MAN (when generally healthy) and it will metablize excess calories. When none are available, it will burn stored calories, when not available it will burn fat stores. Here's what I would do and have done: take a personal inventory about what you are really eating, no gimmics, no "I think". You may have to write it down. Infact, write it down for two days anyway: any morsel that meets your lips. Face the honest truth, and decide to change it. That's the only way you will truly see a change for good.
If I were you I'd start at the very beginning and work on sensing satiety and working for that feeling every time you eat. You should also workout, but moderately, one hour 3-4 days is GREAT for regular joes...if you are watching HOW much you eat. I have a whole step by step guide for learning how to eat to lose weight, but that's the begining step and this post is way too long for more.
Also, a disclaimer: if the honest truth is you have have been sincere about watching every calorie and working out 5 days a week for an hour I suggest you see a doctor. By now, you should definetly be seeing serious results. I know I haven't even come close to meeting that criteria and I've seen results (just so you know I am an A-Type body type so it's not easy for me at all to lose any stinking weight). You may need some testing done. Here's something to consider: are you breast feeding? For some that hinders more than help.

I have a ton more to say because as a woman I've been through all the loops, but I just leave this small personal note: Keep working on being TRULY healthy, that is so important to me, but be happy. Love yourself, eat ice cream with your sweetheart on date night. Be glad you have legs and eyes and everything else to take in life. Don't get discouraged because you aren't a size 8 or 6 or whatever, it will come in time. Be happy now and look for improvement. Life is to be laughed in and you are to love yourself, body included!